Whether or not I’m religious is of no importance to this entry. I am merely making an observation based on things I have learned and things I have seen. I find it…interesting that religion is (and may have always been) profitable. Now, I will be fair and speak for myself because this certainly does not encompass all religions (there are so many religions and thousands of Christian subcategories).
I was raised to be Roman Catholic. I went to church every Sunday and I attended a Catholic school for early elementary and middle education. I memorized my prayers, took communion and was confirmed. That is all I will say for now about my religious upbringing.
There is a store near my house that sells religious merchandise such as bibles, CD’s, jewelry etc. and I went into it a few weeks ago, but I forgot the reason why. Anyways, I was browsing through the various wares when I stumbled upon a Jesus Toothbrush. One more time:
A Jesus Toothbrush.
So your pearly whites can be as white as the Pearly Gates =)
My first thought was “Really?…like REALLY? A TOOTHBRUSH?!!!” You can stick the name of Jesus in your grimy mouth every morning, noon and night? Now, I may be in the wrong here, but isn’t that taking it just a little too far? Apparently not, because you can also buy:
- A Jesus bobble head (He nods at you as you scream profanities at the car that cut you off)
- A Jesus tin of scripture mints (When your breath smells like hell.)
- A Grow-Your-Own Jesus (Put it in water and he grows)
- Oh and of course….a Jesus THONG! (No Jesus collection would be complete without a Jesus thong.)
And that’s just the crazy stuff. Upon a more thorough search I learned you can also buy Jesus mugs, Jesus candles, Jesus T-shirts, Jesus bumper stickers, Jesus books (that aren’t the bible), Jesus CD’s (also known as Christian Bands. They also have Christian Rap and Rock), Jesus pet collars, Jesus clocks, Jesus boxers, Jesus sunglasses (I’ve heard heaven is pretty bright), Jesus scarves, Jesus magnets, Jesus key chains, Jesus hats…*breathing heavily from exhaustion*
…Jesus blankets, Jesus towels, Jesus socks, food with a likeness of Jesus burnt onto it, Jesus candy bars, Jesus posters, Jesus spoons, and all of the merchandise I just mentioned, but with a parody of Jesus instead. All of this stuff can be found with a quick search on Google if you don’t believe me.
Jesus has become a commodity used to brand and sell merchandise. Isn’t that a bit sad, to say the least? A figure of someone’s faith can be worn around your dog’s furry little neck, or even worse…your crotch. Is it just me, or does that strike you as wrong, if not hypocritical? Doesn’t the Bible say something about living humbly and abandoning earthly possessions?
And who are the people who buy all of this useless Jesus merchandise? I have a hunch it is probably the same people who put money into the basket that is passed around every Sunday.
Where does that money go anyway? I’ll give you a hint: The Pope has a wardrobe full of robes, hats, accessories and jewelry that aren’t cheap. Oh, and Jesus doesn’t multiply a $20 bill many times over the way he did with the bread and fish in order to finance hush money for little boys who were touched by priests.
The Jesus BRAND is going strong and will continue to do so as long as there is consumerism and religion. I think capitalists should marvel at how Christianity has morphed into one of the most profitable businesses ever created. Think about that.
If for some reason anything I have said offends you, those who have not put money in a basket at church and are not wearing any Jesus merchandise may cast the first stone. I don’t mean to anger anyone. It’s quite humorous actually, but kinda sad when you think about it. And if you’re a capitalist, it’s brilliant. Remember, Logic is not your enemy.
Finally…“Matthew 19:24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.” I don’t think piling on Jesus merchandise will help you fit through that hole any easier.
On the bright side, maybe Jesus will comment on how stylish your “WWJD?” T-shirt is as you walk through the Pearly Gates…if you can make it there.
Happy Traffic Cone! 
I’m pretty sure you’re going to offend someone with this blog, but it’s not me.
I’m not what you would call religious at all, I used to go to sunday school as a child and I guess I live my life in a christian-like way but I don’t need a god or a pope to tell me how to do it.
As for the commercialism, it’s so far over the top now it’s laughable but it’s not just religion. Everyone’s cashing in wherever and whenever they can.
Money doesn’t make the world go round, but it’s an awfully bumpy ride without it.
Lol so true! And I’m glad you understood my point. Best to you =)
Whenever anyone sneezes I reply, “Jesus smells like cherries”. After I get the “look”, I reply, “Well, he does, according to the air fresheners that are sold with Jesus on them”… Made in China for only $2.49 your car can ‘smell’ like Jesus. Hmmmm, I always thought that Jesus would smell like Patchouli. Hahahaha. The commodification of religion is very interesting to me. One: Because I don’t understand how this promotes so called “Christian values” and; Two: The profitability of this business goes right into the hands of those that are doing the oppressing. I’ve always thought that this needed an in depth look from a sociological perspective. Nice work HappyTrafficCone!
Hello Lisa! I’m glad you liked my post =) Personally I think Jesus would smell like warm Middle Eastern musk with a hint of supreme awesomeness. Hugs!